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The greetings eventually became more domestic; birthday wishes to mutual friends, washing the dogs, an occasional (and reluctant) greeting from one of the boys.
Sometimes, I just fired up the webcam and ate cereal, about as domestic as it gets.* * *Upon first deciding to meet in person, B and I agreed we wouldn’t have sex for 24 hours.
As I’d said to a friend earlier that day, “If she’s not already in my bed, it’s too far to go.”Emotional distance has always gotten the better of me, so my friend, a couples’ therapist, suggested I try online dating.
The safety of not having to meet a person in real life, she said, might lead me to speak more honestly about myself.
I could see myself with each version of this woman. The shopkeeper pointed to a row of brightly enameled copper bands.It had taken months just to bring myself to delete her girl’s birthday alert on my calendar. B and I traveled back and forth eight times, and, two years later, we got married.So, when I set to crafting my dating profile, I announced upfront that I wanted a family. Shame about the distance”—and immediately logged off. I took the phone to my bedroom and read the reply.“Distance? It was a start.* * *Two weeks after our wedding, I threw my ring—over what, I don’t remember, likely something to do with how careless we’d been, in the case of the children, inconsiderate.Yet, over time, as people asked to see the ring, they assumed the design was intentional.I began to wonder if it doesn’t take a marriage to fix a marriage.